What’s going on?

Dearest Someone,

I feel a bit like a guest in my own life, I feel as though I’m sitting watching myself, observing my recovery, and waiting for a grand finale. It’s difficult to explain, my mind is a mess, but also perfectly clear. I feel as though I’m thinking coherently, and recovery is possible and everything is okay, and it’s the first I’ve felt this in a long time. I’ve not made that into a negative, which normally I’m very good at doing – but I also feel very strange. It’d be weird to break everything down into ‘parts’ because the overall sense of things at the moment is pretty positive, but there are parts of me that are apprehensive, slightly confused and questioning my thoughts, feelings and actions.

I guess that as someone who usually blocks things out, and gets on with stuff it does feel odd that I’m not doing…

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